"Far Away"

There is a trouble with long distance relationships that is unlike anything else. When a fight is in full gear it is difficult to be so far away. Talking about it face to face in person simply cannot be done. I can't cry over a fight I don't understand. And, I cannot believe I am in this situation today. Two weeks ago I felt in the same situation, though in Barcelona and face to face, and I thought we were through the worst of it by the time we left.

Going to London to meet with Mr. Incredible felt like I was "coming home." But, I feel like he is in love with a person that I simply am not nor will ever be. He has a way of pushing me away since we met. Sometimes he reacts a certain way, and I wonder if he ever listened to a word I've said. "Do you remember me at all?" Am I the only one he's been talking to?

I've been dreaming and now I'm close to leaving. It's hard for me to understand what he is trying to say to me. Metaphors are not puzzles I can easily solve. And, he play's Nickelback's Far Away, a song that reminds me of us and brings tears to my face. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of trying to understand what you want from me when you won't tell me. I'm exhausted. I'm caffeine depleted. My energy is low. I need to know the simple answer to a simple question.

"Do you wait for me again?"

"My bed's so cold, so lonely
No arms, just sheets to hold me
Has this world stop turning?
Are we forever to be apart?"

"Do you remember me at all?
Do you remember me at all?"

Today's Song: Bullet For My Valentine's Acoustic "Hearts Burst Into Fire"

The workouts will start again as soon as the caffeine is reintroduced. Six weeks remain in my college experience. "I'm screaming. I'm dreaming." I can only hope that this all works out. I still have hope.