"Let's Really Show It"

Ahhh! So, the Christmas season is nearly over. With one more family gathering to tackle, little cleanup left to do, and still a bit of food in the fridge from the last party, I am ready to bring on this next New Year! Whoo!

There's been some major talk about me rediscovering my passion for bodybuilding in the last month especially, and, with the help of one person in particular, I am nearing full focus. I have yet to get to those studies this week though! Ask me again if I have been working on that!

As one who aims high in my goals for the future, I believe that absolutely anything is possible! I've been watching clips on Louise Rogers and focusing in on the road ahead of me. Is it paved in gold? Well, I can certainly tell you it gives me "something to talk about!" I'm just glad that the one I find myself closer to has more knowledge in the area than I do, so I am learning something new everyday in preparation for what is to come!

New workout planning is in the works. Love is in the air. My dedication and focus is being redefined. Now just to get my body defined muscularly! I have some building to do, weights to be lifted, and a diet to reexamine. May I gain the size, build, and consistent dedication I need in the upcoming months! This remains my "little mystery to figure out." Thank you for your loving support!

Happy holidays! - Nutmegpeach

Today's song: "Something to Talk About" by Bonnie Raitt

"We've Got The Dreamers Disease"

I think "you've got the music in you." I know I have the music in me, and I'm not about to give up! Keep on dancing! Whoo! And with three longs days left to tackle, let's be done with this holiday season already.

I think I'm in love with Kris Murrell. Why didn't someone tell me about her sooner? I have lived a sheltered life. Thank you to those who beat me out of it! You don't have a clue how much I appreciate it!

I have got to get out of this funk and get back on track! I have been dreaming about this for far too long and now I can smell it. Do you know the feeling of empowerment? Imagine it and soak as much of that into your reality. Let’s take this on! I have some serious training to do! On another note, I finally found a way to make this crappy peach mango protein that was donated to me taste decent. Well, as best it can. Ha.

My thoughts are far too sporadic, but let me try and recap where I’m at.

I’m fairly certain I’ve found the man of my dreams. He’s relit the flame that was dying out from inside of me. My fire is burning strong, and I think others can sense it. My training, though, currently takes a backseat to talking to him all night. Someone let him know I need to train after work!

Work is still my least favorite thing in the world, so why do I spend more time doing it than anything else? I need a trainer to kick my butt a few times, but I have one in particular in mind. And, I need to not be sick anymore; I’ve had enough. The beginning of the year always allows me to reset in terms of work slowing down freeing up more time to plan, workout, eat, and rest, all my favorite things to do!

I dread the holidays; they’re one of my least favorite things in this world. I’m not against traditions, but I think I want my own apart from the rest of the world. What do you think about that? I cannot stand what expectations are put upon us to give our families some kind of show during the holidays. I’m sorry, but I have better things to do with my time and money than decorate, cook, shop, and watch myself eat like a pig.

One of the things I need to learn with my training is how to eat more though. I know I don’t currently eat enough nor have I in the past. I have this intense fear of getting fat, but I know that as long as I continue to press on with my workouts I’ll be fine. There is not an ounce of me that wants to let go of this dream. Some may not believe what I have done to avoid the possibility of losing it. I have records of past eating and workouts that may need some serious review to help me back on track.

The night has fallen, I haven’t lost the light, and it’s time to rest up! I’ll be in touch. Happy holidays everyone.

Much love, - Nutmegpeach

Today's song: "You Get What You Give" by New Radicals

"Keep Your Eyes On The Prize"

I have had this big dream of competing in figure competitions and earning my pro card. The reality hit me tonight that most of those women have unnatural work done, something I never imagined me ever contemplating. It just has never been an option in my mind, except perhaps maybe after having a couple little people. Still, the dream remains. It's where I see my future.

I had a much different plan for this post having looked at so many figure pages before being disappointed with my previously mentioned realization. It remains that I have a goal to add ten pounds of lean muscle to this body. Christmas is almost here, which means training comes back into full swing. Work becomes slow, and Sara comes back to life!

I'm writing this far too early this morning, as I have yet to sleep. After a long night's conversation with my very dear friend in London, I sat here thinking about a lot of things. Most of my thoughts have revolved around taking big risks. Do I really see myself doing this? Am I really thinking about this? Do I really want to do this? YES!

Could I use some big changes in my life? Definitely. Would I like London to be part of that change? Yes. Will I train more, eat more, and sleep more to get there? Most definitely. Game on. 'Cause I have big dreams.

To body-building up my figure! Cheers.

Much love, - Nutmegpeach

Today's song: "Big Dreams" - Bow Wow

I really wanted to use DMX's "One More Road To Cross" song so I could use his lyrics "this is life/this is what I know/so to me this is life," but the song didn't have the right affect on me while listening to it again and again.

"Everything Will Be Okay"

Yesterday morning I was watching a member at the club using a jump rope. I nearly laughed as I watched this small human use the rope appearing as a young bird, new to the world, and just learning to use its wings. Small things that cause laughter within us are things we should remember and hold onto tightly. It is the little things in life that make the journey so enjoyable.

I find that despite having been very up and down in my recent levels of health, I haven’t allowed the sickness to destroy my spirit. I do not think I have felt completely well a week straight since I moved into the new place, but my smile still exists as strong as ever. Today I was on Dayquil and Benedryl simultaneously, and my coworker said she couldn’t tell I was sick but could say my eyes looked bigger than normal. Hearing her say that made me laugh. I had a very pleasant day at work despite being drugged up, and everyone else seemed to be in a good Christmas spirit.

Another thing today that made my day: The other day my “service engine soon” light came on and wouldn’t go off. I’m fairly certain it is one of my three sensors out again, but the service engine light didn’t stay on tonight. I had taken the dogs out for their run without concern that it might be something worse than a sensor that needs to be replaced. With the holiday right around the corner, I did not want to have to worry about something seriously wrong with my car. It would have been very bad timing. I just hope now that it doesn’t continue to light up and stay on. Knock on wood.

I haven’t been doing my Dave Ramsey notes, as I was previously. I will have to start again as I renew my budgeting goals with the arrival of the New Year. The final credit card will be paid off early this year. College loans will be going into repayment after I graduate, but I’ve already been making payments. I have a large supply of rice in the pantry to keep me going. I have separate goals for weight gain and health that I hope will not be diminished by my financial goals. But, a single trip out of the country could change everything!

Much love! – Nutmegpeach

Today's song: "Jump Rope" – Blue October

"Not Wrapping This In Ribbons"

It's Christmas time, and I'm quite the grinch. I have no desire to put up my own decorations, buy or wrap gifts, and even taking gifts is difficult. I use the excuse that people have forgotten the meaning of Christmas, but then I don't know if I believe it any more either. But, I'm still not about to lose my hard work trying to follow the ways of Dave Ramsey by falling into the commercial, retail traps.

For a long time I've claimed to be of Christian faith. I do not doubt there may be a God. I do not doubt that there may be more intelligent beings within the cosmos. I have been reading Erich Von Daniken's book "Chariots of the Gods?" and find it completely life transforming. My father revealed similar thoughts to what is said in this book. I myself have always had a hard time believing in Jesus as the one and only son of God, part of THE trinity. I've recently retired my cross pendant from being worn around my neck.

Does this come as no surprise? I think my pastor would be devastated if he read this; I just spoke to him today too. I think he would be wide-eyed and concerned about me. Would my father be surprised to read this? Probably, but perhaps he would be more excited. I find myself interested in ideas that perhaps would have stirred great conversations with the quiet man. Either way, I am doing all the reading and research I possibly can in this lifetime to understand as much as possible.

Remind me, though, to enjoy this life. Who knows if this may be my last?

Today's song: "No Surprise" - Daughtry

"So Sick and Tired..."

"Somebody turn the light on?" No, no no! Turn them off! Let me sleep! Just once! Can you tell where this is going? Ha.

I'm sick for perhaps the third time since I moved in just a few months ago. I wonder if this house or just my habits affect me enough to allow for sickness. I know my nutrition is still great. I know I'm not getting enough sleep or exercise though. So, I am about at the end of my rope. Thank goodness the holidays are almost over!

I must go study though, as finals are this week as well!

Much love, - Nutmegpeach

Today's song: "Candle" - The White Tie Affair

"The Final Countdown"

Who would have known that a Europe song would make my day? I had the most hilarious moment during my day when the song started to sound from the speakers. I graduate in May. "So, this is it," says Bill excited for me while standing at the stretching stations at the gym. Overhead "The Final Countdown" begins to play. HA... how did that song have amazing timing? :) I LAUGHED HARD!

I am in a final countdown, especially for the year of 2009! There are seventeen full days of this year left! I can hardly believe it, as so much has happened this year. Still, it seems like not much has changed! I am determined to make some BIG changes this next year. I will come up slowly with a running list. Let's see how much I can do. Here's to making progress!

Much love! - Nutmegpeach

Today's song: "The Final Countdown" - Europe

New Year Bringing New Changes

Watch for the changes to occur. The blood is burning in my veins. I have new motivation. I'm burnt out, but the fight is on! I'm exhausted at the moment, but I will update soon enough. Much love. -Nutmegpeach